Hot and sweaty

Don't be mislead by the title, I am talking about the weather! Aw man, weather says its only 102 but don't worry because it feel like 109 outside!

But praise God while it is hot outside, for some reason it doesn't feel that bad. While I am sweating I don't feel like I am sweating that much. Funny huh? Seems a little crazy to me... plus there is a breeze, which is such a blessing! I mean, as long as you don't stand in the sun... otherwise your skin just might melt off lol.
But praise God because I can ride the bus instead of walking all of it, and praise God that the bus is mostly cold... its colder than outside anyways. :).

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Blessed we are.

Ever thought about how blessed we are?
I wanted two movies last night., both making me think about how blessed we are to live in america.... or how blessed I am to live in a house. To be able to travel back and forth between work and home without walk most of it. How blessed I am to have sources where I can buy food at. Nice clothes to wear, shoes to walk in, to ablitly to walk inside a cold bulding from hot weather, clean and cold water.... seems silly sometimes to count these things for blessings but... man they are blessings. All these things and more, the fact I can watch movies, safe to believe in God.

Lord, truly you have blessed me. So help me to bless others around me, let my lips be filled with your praise always.

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Be careful little ears...

My phone has this cool bible app that will read me the bible, but man as I was listening to the book of james today... it was intense.

Am I just being a hearer and not a doer? Am I a friend of the world, therefore a hater of God? To I show favor to people who are rich than to people who are poor? Do I not love others as myself? Do I put my hope in riches? Do I control my tongue? So that it does not start fires?

So many questions to examine my life with and see how I am living my life, its so good to hear the word of God. I am super excited that I can start listening to the bible and getting some life into my brain where I didn't have as much time before since my day was filled. Now it cannot replace reading the bible but it is still good stuff :).

Adios Amigos.

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Ants, sun, and a green bench

Ya know, I was thinking about friends....
Like good friends who love you, care about you, wanna know what's going on, who texted you to say hello, and bug you until you get to hang out, you joke, you tease, who will go out of there was to be friends even when its hard.... now no one is perfect, no one can always be perfect but I truthfull can think of three maybe, four people in my life who are friends like that to me and two of them are my siblings.... do you ever sit down and think about true friends and friendship? I do and I am so thankful to my three but... out of so many who call themself my friends only so few are actualy friends.

Although I don't see the imperfection in people's friendship towards me but also minee towards others. I could only say a doezn people I do this to, but fewer who responde... isn't it sad? To long for real friendship with people but see it no where to be found? My longest and most likely friendships are with my brother and sister, which I am so blessed with! But where is this so called body of church? So called community? How many times do I have to be rejected before I am accepted? I am hurting and I am sick and tired of friendship that are one way, take more than the give, only reject....

But it is not a gift if we expect something in return, is it?

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The L and R words

No matter how cool I act about it or even say I am good with where I am (which I am), there is still a longing there inside my heart.

I have to say that when I was a kid there was a couple things I always wanted to be when I grew up but this is something that has never changed and I have always wanted to happen.... meeting someone, falling in love/having a relationship, and getting married. I have always had thay desire, but now that I am the age that is prime for it... I am nervous. Scared, of what that actually means. I think sometimes in our "christian" world we get in the mind set of waiting for the one. I believe this doesn't mean what we think it means. God said "its not good man should be alone, let us make him a mate".

One thing I was thinling about is the fact that most people back in the day got married super earlier, ya know 12-16. By 20 you were slightly an old maid and by 30 you were a "crazy cat lady" (no ofference indeeded). But back in the day, yeah the women would wait for the man but what about in our day when I don't see anyone actually looking for the one? Not saying go out and date every guy, or open your heart to anyone who asks because that's stupid and harmful, but why are we waiting for 20 different signs from God or the perfect moment when a man(or woman) comes in with their face a glow, hair blowing in the wind and everything is the perfect moment?

In our world we made such an ideal out of love and romance, do we realize what true love is? Would we know it if it hit us in the face?
- I am not sure if I would, but there is no sweeter love than the love of God. This I know to be true, and no love can ever fill that longing deep inside of us unless its the love of God, like the saying goes " there is a God sized hole in all of us."

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Africa

Recently one of my roommates went on a missions trip to africa and it got me thinking about my trip.
I was never good at full sharing what happened when I was there and since it was about 5 years ago my memory is a little hazed but there are things I remeber and I do wanna share.

Going to africa wasn't my choice, its not like I felt called or had wanted to go really bad. I wanted to go on another trip and a couple months before hand I wasn't able to make it and so off to Botswana I went. Now I had been on a trip before so I wasn't to nervous but of course going somewhere for two months for a lil fifteen year old is still... out there but God is amazing He provides and he did provide.

Seeing how my first airplane right was from dallas to Japan, I wasn't that nervous about the travel there and since I spent years in a RV living I was used to traveling but travelimg 30+ hours was just a bit hard :).

Anyways, I wanna start posting some of my memories of the events but I've said enough on the supject.

Farwell for today :)

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Cloud day please stay

This being my first post... you might think that I would explain why I am now starting a blog and all that jazz but I am not. Instead I just wanna write... or more of type which is writing in our modern world.

What if... (have you ever completely gone off the deep end and seriously thought through situation what will most likely never happen? I do :D)
What if we actually said what we were thinking and feeling, no masking, burrying, acting, lying... to me it sounds dangerous. Scary and it makes me worried, how would I protect myself? And something are really better left unsaid.

Next order of business!!
Toady, in the spirit of um.. well living life, I choose that I would ride the bus to tempe marketplace after work. While this doesn't seem like much of adventure it is WAY out of my usual comfort zone. Which I am happy/proud of myself of doing. I hope that I can get home before its dark... so by 7:30-8pm. While I live in a pretty safe area, the way to get to my house might as well be called crazy train (though I have decided that any bus is usually crazy train lol).

And here I sit on the bus riding to tempe marketplace, look at all the people. Each one has dreams, a life, hopes, friends, family, loved ones, memories.... crazy. People have their thoughts and feelings, they are just as complex... as me, funny to think about but it makes me smile.

ENOUGH!
Lol, scare ya? Anyways, time to say fairwell and I hope you have greeaattt day :).

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